"When they had brought their boats to shore, they left everything and followed him." v11
Have you ever walked away from a task others expected you to deal with because you felt profoundly called to something else? What did that feel like?
Or do you always finish what you start? If so, how do you feel about those who walk away - and your self?
I'm answering both of these questions together today.
I always used to finish what I started. Since Rich died, I often don't remember what it was I started, when I said I'd do it or what I was supposed to do about it. I have a Book of Words that I write things down in, that makes life easier, and GoogleKeep for when I am out and about and need to remember things. I think it's getting better - but then I don't think it is sometimes. And that's ok, this is part of who I am now. I have read that this could be a form of PTSD, but I think that's a bit extreme. I waver about going to the doctor, but he has ill patients to see!
And there we go. That paragraph is an excellent example of failing to finish what I started. I got distracted and wandered off on a tangent.
It is one of the things I pray about - that I don't let anyone down by being forgetful, especially my son, or my class.
Sunday, 26 July 2015
Friday, 24 July 2015
Matthew 20:20-28
Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Matthew 20: 26-28
Questions
These words of Jesus are so well known and yet turn our understanding of the worldly view of worth and excellence on their heads.
How open are you to these "kingdom values"?
I find it hard to know how to put them into practice. My job isn't one in which I can let my children lead! My life is busy, and although I try and maintain this role within the household, allowing J to make the decisions and putting myself towards the background, he doesn't always seem to want this role. I am trying to mold a 'servants heart' towards the family, and towards others at school, and I know that I am often called upon to do things because they know I will.
And honestly, how difficult do you find it even to deny a sense of pride of being ever more humble than someone else?
I'm not sure that I am any good at being humble! I am focusing on not boasting, not putting myself first, and I am pleased when I feel as though I have succeeded, because it isn't easy. Perhaps this feeling is what the author feels is the wrong feeling?
Matthew 20: 26-28
Questions
These words of Jesus are so well known and yet turn our understanding of the worldly view of worth and excellence on their heads.
How open are you to these "kingdom values"?
I find it hard to know how to put them into practice. My job isn't one in which I can let my children lead! My life is busy, and although I try and maintain this role within the household, allowing J to make the decisions and putting myself towards the background, he doesn't always seem to want this role. I am trying to mold a 'servants heart' towards the family, and towards others at school, and I know that I am often called upon to do things because they know I will.
And honestly, how difficult do you find it even to deny a sense of pride of being ever more humble than someone else?
I'm not sure that I am any good at being humble! I am focusing on not boasting, not putting myself first, and I am pleased when I feel as though I have succeeded, because it isn't easy. Perhaps this feeling is what the author feels is the wrong feeling?
Thursday, 23 July 2015
Philemon 1-21
Philemon 1-21
Quoted section
15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever— 16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.
To ponder.
How many of your opinions and judgements of others are still formed by your sense of worth of deserving or another's seeming status in society?
I get a class list each July that I look at and try very hard not to make judgements on. I think about the children, what I know of them so far, what the family is like (if we know them) and whether I've come across these children around school. Inside that, are the little judgements. Who reads at home? Who always has kit? Who tries hard? Who has parents that are interested in the education side of school as opposed to just the babysitting service that we apparently run as well? Who is on Free School Meals? Who is earning their parents DLA and is there anything we can do to help that child and do the parents want us to or would they rather keep the cash? (Yes, I've had parents like that, at another school)
I see children who deserve more educational help than *that* child, but won't get it because *that* child has a parent who shouts louder, or is on benefits, or whatever. That makes me angry.
How difficult is it for you to receive the acceptance of another person?
In the past it has been very difficult. Being older has taught me that to a certain extent I don't care any more - I have what is important - and to question if I want that acceptance in the first place. If being accepted means being a 'yes' man, then I won't be doing it just for that.
In the light of these two questions, how does this passage speak to you?
Paul wants Philemon to accept Onesimus back, but not as his slave. Onesimus is now a freed man, an adopted child of Paul, and would be working for Paul, rather than Philemon. There's no mention of who would be paying the wages though! I feel a bit sorry for Philemon - he's got no choices really. He'll look like an unChristian heel if he refuses to take Onesimus back, but at the same time if he does take him back, the situation is (for a Roman) totally untenable.
God accepts us for who and what we are, as well as giving us the choice to be something else. Onesimus had been in prison, Paul got him out and changed his status and then let him go back to where he was before in a better position than before. God rescues us from stupidity if we let him and then makes things even better than they were before.
Quoted section
15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever— 16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.
To ponder.
How many of your opinions and judgements of others are still formed by your sense of worth of deserving or another's seeming status in society?
I get a class list each July that I look at and try very hard not to make judgements on. I think about the children, what I know of them so far, what the family is like (if we know them) and whether I've come across these children around school. Inside that, are the little judgements. Who reads at home? Who always has kit? Who tries hard? Who has parents that are interested in the education side of school as opposed to just the babysitting service that we apparently run as well? Who is on Free School Meals? Who is earning their parents DLA and is there anything we can do to help that child and do the parents want us to or would they rather keep the cash? (Yes, I've had parents like that, at another school)
I see children who deserve more educational help than *that* child, but won't get it because *that* child has a parent who shouts louder, or is on benefits, or whatever. That makes me angry.
How difficult is it for you to receive the acceptance of another person?
In the past it has been very difficult. Being older has taught me that to a certain extent I don't care any more - I have what is important - and to question if I want that acceptance in the first place. If being accepted means being a 'yes' man, then I won't be doing it just for that.
In the light of these two questions, how does this passage speak to you?
Paul wants Philemon to accept Onesimus back, but not as his slave. Onesimus is now a freed man, an adopted child of Paul, and would be working for Paul, rather than Philemon. There's no mention of who would be paying the wages though! I feel a bit sorry for Philemon - he's got no choices really. He'll look like an unChristian heel if he refuses to take Onesimus back, but at the same time if he does take him back, the situation is (for a Roman) totally untenable.
God accepts us for who and what we are, as well as giving us the choice to be something else. Onesimus had been in prison, Paul got him out and changed his status and then let him go back to where he was before in a better position than before. God rescues us from stupidity if we let him and then makes things even better than they were before.
Except I didn't.
I started this blog 5 years ago and then never wrote in it.
Grief is a peculiar thing. It made me want to do things and get them all ready to do and then never bring them to completion. Theory and research says completion means ending, ending is death.
Ah well.
I'm trying again.
Grief is a peculiar thing. It made me want to do things and get them all ready to do and then never bring them to completion. Theory and research says completion means ending, ending is death.
Ah well.
I'm trying again.
Saturday, 19 June 2010
To explain.
This is another blog. It's to let me focus and record some thought that will be generated by an app that I've downloaded to the iPhone. The app is one for the Methodist church, and has a prayer for the day, bible reading and study, and questions for thinking about.
So that's the plan. Read it, ask it, think about it, write it.
Simple.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
So that's the plan. Read it, ask it, think about it, write it.
Simple.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
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